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Torchwood: Children of Earth: Day Four

3:40 in, with 1:20 to go. That's when Torchwood finally sprang into action.

It was a long time coming. Too long, as I've complained before. But maybe the irrelevance of Torchwood to the first two thirds of this story is not a bug but a feature. Because I swear, the moment Lois said "Torchwood," and everyone panicked, my heart skipped a beat.

Despite the tragedy at the end of the episode, the darkest hour of the story is the centerpiece of the episode, as they argue over which ten percent of the children have got to go. We're dealing with two different kinds of terror here: The alien monsters, and the human monsters. It's the same kind of compelling, gripping drama we had in Midnight, only this time it's on a scare where millions are at stake, not just half dozen tourists.

These are the scenes that really sell the relevance of Torchwood. In the absence of the Doctor, somebody has to step in to stop this. And if the dubious quality of the first two series of Torchwood left you in doubt as to whether Jack, Gwen, and Ianto are the ones you want handling the situation, then surely, in that moment, you must have been a convert. The first three and a half episodes of Children of Earth seem designed to get us to this point where the viewer needs Torchwood as badly as the fictional world of the story does.

Day Four has some problems, of course. Clement's death, while dramatic and sad, leaves me feeling underwhelmed by the character's role in the story. And Jack's family, which I was hoping would play a more complex role in the story, at least with regard to Jack's character arc, seem reduced to little more than standard hostages. And more important to Jack than the imprisonment of his family is the big death in this episode.

RTD wouldn't use cheap tricks to get himself out of a corner. Would he?

The loss of Ianto is painful but, perhaps, necessary. For two seasons Ianto made Torchwood tolerable and was easily the best thing about the program, but that's simply no longer the case here. Killing Ianto takes the training wheels off while simultaneously providing one of the saddest death scenes I've seen in a long time. Killing the entire freaking building would have been sufficient, but taking out Ianto Jones makes it personal. It's shocking because at the end of series two, I never expected them to kill both Tosh and Owen, and with that wound still fresh in the program's memory I honestly thought Gwen and Ianto were both safe for this outing. But RTD has done nothing short of out-Whedoning Joss Whedon here, with the random unexpected death of a character who simply doesn't deserve it.

But is Ianto really going to stay dead for long? Cheating death has been a running theme throughout the first two series of Torchwood, with Jack being the most obvious example and Owen being another notable one, but let's not forget Suzie Costello or Eugene from Random Shoes. But Russell T Davies wouldn't write himself into a corner and then use cheap tricks to get himself out of it. That's beneath him. Isn't it? Isn't it? Isn't it?

Which touches upon my greatest fear for this series: that Russell will drop the ball where it matters most. If Day Five sucks, then none of the excellent four that preceded it will matter one jot and history will remember this as the Torchwood series that was almost good. Which won't be accurate, because regardless of what comes next the first four episodes have been spectacular.

So how's it going to end? A surprise cameo from the Doctor? A reset button that brings back Ianto (and Tosh and Owen)? The revelation that Mr. Dekker is a Time Lord (perhaps the War Chief)? A big musical number? Regardless, it'll all be over in a couple of hours and we'll be crying or cheering or heckling or whatever.

I Want to Believe

Torchwood: Children of Earth: Day Three

 Incredible. The best so far.

The confrontation between Frobisher and the 456 halfway through the episode? Sweet Jesus that's intense! Oldest trick in the book, not showing the monster, but it's the way to go. We have no idea what the hell is in that tank aside from the fact that it leaves a lovely residue and is prone to violent outbursts seemingly at random. Some of the sound effects came out a bit Raxacoricofallapatorian, but I really didn't care. That's no Slitheen. That's a threat. The foggy visuals and the deep voice are important, but the timing really sells it. The suddenness of the physical outbursts. The occasional delay or refusal to respond. It's clear who's in charge of this conversation and it's not the one who's doing the all the talking.

Which is why Capaldi's performance at Frobisher is so important to selling the scene. Luckily he's superb. At the end of the exchange, when he shudders and slumps (you and me both, friend), that's magic. Frobisher has been the surprise standout of this show and the real lynchpin of the story. His conversation with Jack, his reception of the news that he's the scapegoat: there's such humanity to the character, and it's a pleasure when he's on screen.

Lois is winning me over. Although Jumbo is occasionally overshadowed by Capaldi, her performance is itself a marvelous part of the episode, with her bluff being a defining moment both for her character and the suitably nasty Bridget Spears. It's the secondary characters who really shine. I'm even willing to forgive the unfortunately small role of PC Andy for the sake of the daring escape attempt by Alice.

This episode has everything I've come to like about the new Torchwood and then some. It develops the mysteries in an interesting way, contains some fantastic character acting by a cast broad enough that I couldn't praise them all without making this review seem like a shopping list, and a monster whose creepiness sells the alien threat hard enough to justify all the fuss. In short, I loved it.

But I'm still troubled by it. There's a lot of optimism for the future of Torchwood buzzing around the net over the past couple of days, but is that optimism really justified if the only way Torchwood's managed to make a hit is by sidelining its own main characters? Frobisher is the star of this story, and the plot is the government's handling of 456's arrival. Torchwood itself has been demoted to subplot status, at least so far. A confrontation between Torchwood and the 456 seems inevitable, once the team manages to get their act together. The destruction, scattering, reunion, and re-establishment of the Torchwood team over the past two hours is a transparent ploy on behalf of the writers: it serves the dual function of padding for length and stalling for time, keeping the team busy for two episodes while the groundwork is laid for Day Four and Day Five. I think. It will be hard to say until we've seen the story in its entirety

This type of storytelling is normal and forgivable, even occasionally appropriate, and here it's working well. to reiterate: I love Children of Earth thus far and Day Three has some of its best moments yet. What I'm troubled by is not the story but an external consideration: if The Powers That Be have decided that the proper way to write Torchwood is to keep the stars in secondary roles while the plot is happening elsewhere, that may make for a good story but isn't it problematic in the long run?

Maybe it's a moot point, because the revelations about Jack's involvement with the events of 1965 have put him dramatically front and center. Which solves that problem but opens up an entirely different can of worms. It's a return to Torchwood's old formula, with the same old "Jack's-mysterious-past-catches-up-with-him" storytelling that's been a hallmark of this program since the beginning. The Doctor-ifying of Jack is one of the most annoying things in the contemporary Whoniverse, with the companion-ifying of the rest of the Torchwood team being a natural consequence of that. Jack is not the Doctor. Trying to make him the Doctor cheapens Jack, the Doctor, and the rest of the Torchwood team. And  it looks like we may be going down that road again.

All of that is troubling. But Children of Earth has been awesome so far and there's just so much to love about this most recent installment. Maybe that's why I find myself feeling like it's too good to be true, and that a sudden, sharp drop in quality is inevitable. I hope I'm wrong.

And by the way, where's Nick Briggs? Isn't he meant to be in this? I hope he jumps out of nowhere to provide a deus ex machina in the last ten minutes of Day Five. Wouldn't that be lovely?

Oh, God. I've jinxed it, haven't I?

Look! It's Captain Jack! And he's still frozen in carbonite!

Torchwood: Children Of Earth - Day Two

While exciting in its own way, Day Two is less impressive. Day One was new and shiny, practically a soft reboot of the program. The character dynamic was all new: Gwen telling Jack "There's a computer, do it yourself" leads not to bickering but a soft chuckle from Ianto. Gwen touches a photo of Tosh and Owen and says "good morning" as though it's a time-honored ritual (I'm reminded of the Unknown Soldier photo in the briefing room on the Battlestar Galactica). The introduction of Ianto's family, and especially Jack's, was a pleasant surprise for me. And the destruction of the Hub eliminates the status quo (and, in fact, the core concept of what the Torchwood Institute is all about). It's a different show now.

Day One raised the bar; Day Two merely meets it, and unfair is it may be, that's less impressive. Fay's Day Two functions mainly to connect the dots between Davies' Day One and Day Three, and in that Day Two works marvelously. There's nothing innovative or shocking in this episode; even Jack's resurrection is obvious (it's not a question of whether he'll come back, it's a question of how it works). This episode is mostly a straightforward rehearsing of those time-honored traditions of going on the lam, and staging a rescue. I'm surprised they didn't employ the Wookiee Gambit while rescuing the Jack. With Gwen as the Wookiee, of course, odd as that sounds.

That fairly standard plot is made to shine because of Euros Lyn's consistently inspired direction and the script's focus on character. Gwen and Rhys's conversation while surrounded by potatoes has the Davies touch. Whether Fay successfully channeled Davies, or Davies had an uncredited hand in this script, the entire episode still has the flavor of RTD's better qualities. And, unfortunately, some of his worse ones as well, with occasional lapses in logic designed to eliminate digressions that could detract from plot and character. As I said, it's forgivable, because it keeps things moving and allows for exciting moments like Jack's rescue and Ianto's family swarming the car.

That's where the heart and the narrative thrust is, but the mystery and intrigue is elsewhere, in the subplot involving the Home Office. Watching Capaldi's harrowed Frobisher try to cope it all, it's easy to feel for him like a protagonist, which he's not. Cush Jumbo rather good as Lois, and while I'm not sure whether I buy her as a permanent addition to the team, I'm looking forward to seeing where her character goes in the coming days. What's exciting me is that I can't guess what's going to happen next. Lois's role in all of this is a mystery, as is the nature of the alien threat, and I can't imagine what will happen when the team finally confronts Frobisher. It's all so murky.

It's sad to see so little development for two other unpredictable elements in the plot: Jack's daughter, Alice, and poor old Clement. Obviously, however, I won't have long to wait before I see them again, as the new episode is on in just a couple of hours. I have a feeling that these characters are going to be important, and with Day Three being one of the dots being connected by this episode, I wouldn't be surprised if the both have prominent roles on that dot.

Torchwood has always been about a "team," but so far Children of Earth has focused more on individual characterization than showing any actual teamwork. That's a deliberate structural feature of this episode, with the destruction of the hub corresponding to a decentralization that splinters the group. Splitting the characters up, giving them separate journeys and having them come back together is a time-honored storytelling tactic that's been done in Doctor Who hundreds of times, but I'm not sure it's what Torchwood needed right now. In any case, the team's back together now for the start of Day Three, so tonight we should get a glimpse of Torchwood in action. And hopefully we'll see them deal with the 456, instead of seeing them deal with the government while the government deals with the 456. That may get old fairly soon, and I desperately want not to be left down by this new, better Torchwood.

And give us a bit more PC Andy tonight. Please?

The Technical Name is a Gizmo.

I considered writing a review of the other Day One as a joke, but that'd be a bit cheap and annoying, wouldn't it?

 Torchwood: Children of Earth: Day One   

Torchwood's been a mixed bag. We all know it. Sometimes the writing, acting, direction, and the very stars themselves align, and Torchwood pulls together for a compelling episode. But it's rare. The show has problems and I won't pad the review rehearsing them because you already understand what it is that keeps me from being comfortable calling myself a "fan" of Torchwood.

Even so.

I'd been excited for Children of Earth, and a lot of Torchwood quasi-fans have felt the same. Perhaps that's why RTD (or whoever) took the "special event" approach. It saves money, obviously, but it allows them to whip up a frenzied optimism that would otherwise be impossible. But Torchwood simply has to deliver. Otherwise, there will be backlash (see: Planet of the Dead for what happens when specials aren't special enough). There is no middle road: It's either great or it's shit.

And I'm thinking... maybe... not shit?

Because this time, it's different. No longer is it a rehash of Buffy or a gratuitously "adult" Doctor Who. This really is something refreshingly and different. Cinematic. Creepy. Atmospheric. Funny. Above all, ambitious. The approach has changed. The over-the-top brashness, which has been alternately played for melodrama and laughs, is reigned in and made subservient to the storytelling. Frankly, it's hardly Torchwood. Or, as Stuart says, "It’s as though Russell T Davies has taken his original premise and re-engineered it from the bottom up." And this time he's focusing on character, something that was seriously off in Series One and improved only marginally in Series Two. Here it's front and center in Day One, and I realize that I've come to love these characters that I barely cared about a couple years ago.

Not that Day One dwells on characters at the expense of the plot. In fact, there's so much going on in this story that I can barely take it all in. The characters are so numerous, the plot twists so shocking, and the scope so epic, that it's going to take some time to sort out how exactly all of these pieces fit together. And I mean that in a well-constructed-novel sort of way, not in a total-mess-of-poor-storytelling kind of way.

Which is why there's not much more I can say about Children of Earth, yet. Specific comments are going to have to wait until tomorrow at least, partially because I'm not a reviewing dynamo like Stuart and partially because I'm going to need to see more before I can decide how I feel about it. I've said all I can for now, but allow me at least to register my optimism. This will either be one hell of a ride or one spectacular failure.

And if it's the latter... well, at least it'll be over by Friday.

Old Teeth...

...that's weird.

Doctor Who: Planet of the Dead

Regardless whether the remark regarding the Doctor's dentition near the opening of this episode was an intentional nod to his regeneration scene, it's an interesting thing to consider. The Doctor being “determined to keep these teeth” (not to mention David Tennant’s entire body, even if it means making a copy of it) is an interesting way of looking at what's going on in these 2009 specials. It's sad to see Tennant go, but better to pull out the teeth before the decay sets in. Err... okay, never mind. We're done with the tooth metaphor.

Because, even though the teeth aren't the only old thing about the episode, and the “Davies Masterplan” isn't moved forward in any obvious way in this episode, it was altogether an enjoyable romp. I’m not going to shy away from that overused designation, because that’s exactly what this is. A romp. And even while it was silly and derivative and maybe even a bit too much like a normal, non-special episode, it was a good one, and, yes, there are some interesting structural things going on that have important implications for the overall arc of the show. And since that’s the sort of thing I get off on (see my gushing review of the oft-reviled Journey’s End), the episode was enjoyable for me.

Romp, Romp, Romp. Rompity Rompity Romp. Wheee! I’m Romping!

But before I get to all that bullshit, let’s talk particulars. The monster in this instance as a fairly good one. The liberal borrowing from The Langoliers was forgivable because the exact nature and modus operandi of the swarm was an interesting (although not very interesting) science fiction concept that was played well over the course of an hour, with new bits of information coming at all the right times and an appropriately thrilling firefight at the end of the episode. The Tritovore weren’t quite as interesting. I don’t know if they were meant to be a throwback to classic Doctor Who monsters or some kind of bizarre tongue-in-cheek kind of thing, but either way they slightly missed the mark, and they were largely irrelevant to the episode.

The guest cast was a similarly mixed bag. Although the people on the bus were never very interesting or important, they really didn’t need to be. They certainly weren’t the cast of Midnight, but they fulfilled the role of what the producers of Lost call “socks”: Filler characters whose lives and welfare are ostensibly important, but in whom we really don’t need to invest much. However, I thought the UNIT characters were very enjoyable. Erisa Magambo and Malcolm Taylor might not have been rounded characters, with complex personalities, but at least they had personalities, which is something that UNIT has thus far lacked in the revived series. Even Martha seems to have undergone some sort of personality-ectomy when joining up, so it was refreshing to see UNIT characters that were more than just “Drone #3” or “Brass #5”. Malcolm did get a little bit annoying, especially with the unfunny “I love you” bit, which quickly supplanted the Hand Doctor whispering it to Rose as the most obnoxious use of that particular line in television history. But aside from the overall silliness, there was some interesting seriousness, too. Magambo pulling a gun on Malcolm will have ramifications in their professional relationship that I would really enjoy watching play out on screen, so I hope we haven’t seen the last of these two.

I love you! I love you! I love you! I love you!

But, of course, the most important guest star would have to be Michelle Ryan. I can’t say I regretted the opportunity to watch her run around in Lara Croft gear, and I think that overall she had good chemistry with David, who was just being David most of the time. While David has continuously topped himself since beginning in the role, his performances in The Next Doctor and Planet of the Dead have been mostly business as usual. Neil tweeted that he was “working his notice” and I tend to agree that it does seem that way. However, David’s business-as-usual works well with a fresh companion and Michelle Ryan plays nicely off of the standard Tennant fare. But I do have to point out that some of her dialogue was really just awful. “The aristocracy survives for a reason?” Seriouly? And what’s up with, “That’s how I like things: Extreme!” That one far outstrips the lameness of Martha’s “He’s like fire: stand too close and you get burned” from The Sontaran Strategem, and perhaps even approaches Grace Holloway’s “Oh great, I finally find the right guy and he’s from a different planet!” from the Doctor Who telemovie. However, in addition to the dud lines, there were pretty good ones, and even lame ones that were saved by the way she sold them (“We need to apply ourselves to the problem with discipline” reads like something Admiral Ackbar might say, but she has the authority to pull it off nicely). She wasn’t harboring any sort of dark secret, which was what I was expecting but was fairly glad to see was not the case. Her exit leaves the door open for a return, and honestly I’m not exactly hoping to see her again, but neither am I dreading the prospect. She did well here and she made a decent companion.

(Please forgive the lame visual gag and let me have my fun.) It’s her suitability as a companion that I think makes this episode work as well as it does. Structurally (yes, we've arrived at this part of the review now), the episode is very much like a typical companion introduction episode. There are specific shades of Smith and Jones here in a particularly strong way, and the process of them deciding to team up recalls the Doctor and Donna in both The Runaway Bride and Partners in Crime. What makes this episode different is the twist. I’m not sure whether I can rightly call it a twist when I knew it was going to have to play out this way owing to the fact that Michelle Ryan was signed on for only this episode, but was at the very least a structural twist, since based on the presentation of this episode everything up to that point resembles the first episode of a thirteen-episode series, even the air date. But, of course, it is not to be. And the reason is that Christina never passes through the TARDIS door. The Doctor turning down a companion like this is a major step in the arc of his character since Rose, proceeding from the consequences of Journey’s End and specifically (I believe) from his inability to save Donna. In fact, Donna hangs like a shadow over the Doctor in much the same way that Rose once did.

Structure! Struuuuuuuucture!

If you’ll indulge a tangent regarding that similarity between Rose and Donna: I always supported Rose’s return to the program because, even though I wasn’t crazy about the character, I always felt that Doomsday didn’t offer any real closure. Two characters that want to be with one another being separated by a barrier that we are told cannot be breached but already has several times, including by Mickey the idiot of all people, is not closure. Leaving her on the beach with the Hand Doctor and basically saying “you and I are done now, have a good life,” is. When I saw Donna’s “death” in Journey’s End, I was heartbroken, but I saw it as closure. After seeing the Doctor’s comment about Donna in this episode, and then his refusal to take Christina with him, I’ve changed my mind about that. I think that the situation between the Doctor and Donna is very similar to the situation between him and Rose post-Doomsday. The feeling is the same and once again the barrier (like any in Doctor Who) is only apparently insurmountable, and I think something more has to happen there. I don’t know whether it is, because yes, I know her granddad is returning to the program, but I don’t know whether she is (and, at the moment, I’m not interested in knowing, because I’m trying to go without unofficial spoilers if possible), but if Donna’s return figures in Tennant’s finale, I do support it. This might seem like a digression from my discussion about Planet of the Dead, but I really don’t think it is. I think Donna is almost as present in Planet of the Dead as Rose is in “The Runaway Bride.”

But that’s neither here nor there. What will happen will happen. I did think this was overall an enjoyable episode, partially because I’m willing to accept Russell’s decision not to go for anything particularly stunning despite its designation as a “special.” But only this once. He needs to step up his game for The Waters of Mars. His attempt to create buzz at the end of this episode with “He Will Knock Four Times” is pretty exciting, if a bit obvious (clearly, it’s an anagram for “Who Music Foretell Kink,” duh). I think they were trying to recapture the effect they achieved in Partners in Crime with the sudden return of Rose, but this revelation didn’t have nearly as much impact, which is odd because this really was a new revelation for me, while on the other hand everyone and his grandmother knew about Billie Piper’s return for series four. Anyhow, all of this will have to wait until “Later this Year,” i.e. an eternity from now, and all we have to look forward to in the mean time is a full week of Torture.

Er, I mean, -chwood. Yeah, Torchwood. Right.

Hot Air Buffoon

Doctor Who: The Next Doctor

Let's talk a bit about promises.

What the title of this episode promised, in fairly clear terms, was the Eleventh canonical Doctor. But that was never going to happen, was it? No, I didn't think so and I don't suppose you did either. The confirmation that Tennant was leaving in 2010 only left me even more sure that there was going to be a fake-out. But like I said in my reviews of The Stolen Earth and Journey's End, I'm all right with the broken promise as long as it's broken in an interesting way. I was referring specifically to the "regeneration," which was not a regeneration as promised but was nonetheless an event with important consequences that were examined at length over the course of the hour, and in what I thought was quite an interesting and entertaining way. The same is true of The Doctor's Daughter. The implication of the title is that we were going to meet Susan's mum, or at least one of the Doctor's already-existing children, a notion that was thrown out in the cold open in favor of Jenny. Nonetheless, Jenny had a set of implications and consequences all her own. It was a fake-out in favor of something nearly as interesting.

So what did I expect from The Next Doctor? Not the Eleventh Doctor, certainly. But three years ago, The Christmas Invasion arrived like a present wrapped in shiny paper, and when we tore off the wrapping we had a lovely new Doctor that ended the thing with a sword flourish and a quote from the Lion King. This was without a doubt the best Christmas Special so far, and I was hoping that the experience would be mirrored here. Again, we would return to the notion of unwrapping a Doctor, but it wouldn't really be the Doctor, it would turn out to be something else, and as we tore off the paper over the course of the hour we would get to the core of the mystery and it would finally present the solution to the Cybermen's invasion and shock and surprise and thrill us.

There are cosplayers who have more claim to the title of Doctor than Jackson Lake does.

And instead we get this. Halfway into the special, the misunderstanding has already been all cleared up! And if it weren't so boring, it would be funny: in Time Crash, the Fifth Doctor thinks the Tenth Doctor is a fanboy, when he's actually a future incarnation. In The Next Doctor, the Tenth Doctor thinks Jackson Lake is the Eleventh Doctor, but he's just a fanboy, some poor deranged man who has lost everything and has had one too many Doctor Who novels crammed into his cranium in true Chuck fashion. There are cosplayers who have more claim to the title of Doctor than he does. But never mind all of that, because it's quite easily straightened out. The Doctor tosses an infostamp to the nearest Cybermen. "Whoops, sorry, mate, turns out you are the Doctor after all. Our mistake. DELETE. DELETE." After that, there's little left for Jackson Lake to do but uncover the not-all-that-interesting truth about his son, and then literally shove the poor boy into Rosita's arms as he swings from a lamp post and gives an impromptu speech about "that Doctor on high!" and how "he's never once been thanked!" and oh my God I wish I were making this up.

But I can't just spend the whole review talking about the train wreck that is the Jackson Lake story, because this is a two-train collision. One, a story about the Tenth Doctor meeting a man who may or may not be the Eleventh Doctor. The other, a story about Cybermen in Victorian London with a women's liberation subtext and a steampunk design influence. Either one of these stories has so much potential, but the former becomes boring, the latter becomes silly, and neither one can be salvaged from the wreckage. Perhaps, in the spirit of Christmas and presents, my train metaphor should be altered to refer to a child's toy train set. But no, that doesn't accurately convey the brokenness of this episode.

Because even though I buy the Steampunk Cybermen concept, as well as the gender issue, and I can even bring myself to appreciate the pure, epic whimsy of the Doctor battling a giant robot from a hot air balloon, The pieces are assembled together in such an appallingly poor fashion that the only way to salvage any enjoyment out of the episode is to be willing to laugh at how broken everything is. What the hell are those Cybershade things supposed to be? Gorillas? Wookiees? Big fluffy dogs? Miss Hartigan's motives in helping the Cybermen are even shadier. It has something to do with hatred of all things male, that much is clear. Her speech at the graveside of Reverend Whatever is pretty much nonsensical, jumping from half-formed thought to half-formed thought like a Grant Morrison Batman story, but far more superficial and not half as much fun.

Does that info-phallus get iPlayer via the time vortex? I can't even get it here in America.

The problem with the Cybermen plot is that we see lots happen but are rarely given any idea as to how or why. Forget about how the Cybermen returned from the void, which is briefly waved away, but how did they survive it in the first place? How did they construct a giant robot so quickly, and why do they enlist child labor to run it after they've done such an efficient job of building the damned thing? I'm not even sure I understand why the Cybermen all explode after the Doctor re-uses the "LOOK WHAT YOU'VE BECOME LOL!!!!" resolution from The Age of Steel. And how the hell does that info-phallus, stolen from the Daleks that appeared in Doomsday, have footage from Voyage of the Damned or the Christopher Eccleston era, anyway? Is iPlayer available via the time vortex? I can't even get it here in America. In any case, I have to wonder why nobody questioned the logic or the storytelling and asked Russell to clean up the script. Perhaps they're afraid of him. What has he become?

All of this just leads to a barely-coherent mess that's probably the least fun we've ever seen in a Doctor Who Christmas special, which is a pity because, as I said, both of the storylines we see here had so much potential. We've only got a few more hours with Russell and David, and I was hoping that they were going to make every minute count, but sadly this is too much of a mess to count as anything other than evidence that the fresh blood we'll be getting in 2010 really is needed. It's hard to believe how inconsistent Russell has been over the years, giving us messes like this as well as absolute gems such as Midnight. And for the first time, Tennant is given no opportunity to shine at Christmas, taking a back seat to Morrissey whose hammy performance gets old fast.

The actors aren't really what I'm complaining about, though. Even as Morrissey's ham rots, the genuine moments of humanity we see in him are well-performed, and Dervla Kirwan is brings a suitably creepy sort of sexy austerity to Miss Hartigan. Nor is the direction of the episode to fault. In fact, I'd even occasionally use the word "stunning," particularly in the scene at the graveside when the Cybermen attack in the snow. That could become one of the iconic scenes of Doctor Who history. It's just a pity that it comes in an episode with such a terribly broken script that ultimately fails to live up to what it promised. If Planet of the Dead's title is any hint, it might be a more straightforward Doctor Who story that doesn't try to do so much and consequently won't fail so miserably. Or maybe it will. Perhaps it's best not to get my hopes up.

Thanks for the Memory Wipe

Doctor Who: Journey's End

This was brilliant. And the more I think about it, the more brilliant it seems. Elegant. Explosive. Terrifying. Devastating. Thrilling. Thought-provoking. It is everything Doctor Who can and should be, and it wraps up the natural arcs of the most important characters that had been introduced in the four years of the Russel T. Davies era. Or am I imagining it? Am I imagining the symmetry, the closure of loose threads, the deft weaving of various running threads that suddenly culminate all at once in a single explosive and tragic episode? I certainly don't think that I am, but it seems like I must have watched a completely different episode from everyone else because very few people seem to have anything good to say about it.

It's not perfect. Never said it was. It's flawed, sometimes heavily so. But it doesn't have to be perfect to be brilliant. Last week all I was hoping for was that the intolerable storm of fanwank would settle down a little bit so that we could focus on the drama. And it did. There was still fanwank, but a far more appropriate amount, nowhere near the amount of The Stolen Earth. Journey's End was all about character: The Doctor, Davros, Rose, Martha, and Donna in particular. The other characters weren't as integral but their presence was appreciated for the reason that this was a story about the family that the Doctor has accumulated since the Time War, and it wouldn't be the whole family without Sarah Jane, Jack, and even Mickey the idiot.

The examination of the Doctor as a warrior, a soldier, and a deliverer of genocide has long been a concern of the program but this year it has come to the forefront, as the Doctor has found himself causing the destruction of Pompeii, assisting UNIT in the battle against the Sontarans, responsible for a daughter who knows nothing but how to be a soldier and, finally, tasked by the Shadow Proclamation with leading the battle against the new Dalek Empire. Despite his flippant refusal to do so, however, he finds that he has unintentionally done just that. Every single one of his companions (save Donna, we'll get to her in a bit) has become a soldier, willing to commit genocide: the death of every Dalek, every human. This is a chilling and fitting culmination of what was started in Rob Shearman's Dalek, when the Dalek says to the Ninth Doctor, "we are the same," and continued in the Parting of the Ways when the Dalek Emperor calls him "the Great Exterminator." It's something that the Doctor has grappled with ever since, and here he must confront the fact that he's not a Dalek, he's the only thing worse than a Dalek: He's Davros, creator of Daleks. "Is that what you did to her, turned her into a soldier?" Donna asks of Martha in The Sontaran Stratagem. And yes, that's exactly what he did, as we saw then and we see even more clearly now.

I don't really understand why a fully-fledged copy of the Doctor has been interpreted by the fandom as a sex doll, but then again, I've never owned one, so I suppose I don't know what I'm talking about.

And Martha has finally rebounded from the slump she's been in since her Torchwood guest appearances. For the first time since Last of the Time Lords, we see a Martha that we can watch with interest, even if we can't exactly root for her. Her mission is not only a shocking attempt at genocide, but it's also the same mission from the end of series three, twisted, perverted, and combined with the fake mission she had in the same episode (am I the only one who's noticing this, or am I just pulling it out of my arse?). The ludicrous "gun in four parts" which she mocked the Master for believing, combined with the globe-travelling, teaming-with-people-around-the-world mission that she actually undertook. "As if I would ask her to kill," the Doctor says in that episode, almost anticipating Donna's question mentioned above. But he didn't ask her to kill. He just trained her for it and she is now doing it on her own. It's quite ironic that Earth has been dragged accross the cosmos and is sharing a Cascade with the Crucible, which is less Arthur Miller and more George Lucas, and it's in danger of destruction not at the say-so of Peter Cushing (which would be just plain strange, given that this is a Dalek story) but rather at the will of Martha Jones. Digression aside, the point is this: what Martha has become, the Doctor can't help but be ashamed of, but it makes for good television and is a natural continuation of Martha's character. Meanwhile, Martha finally meets Rose and, after Rose's attitude toward her last week, the two finally accept one another: case closed. All right, a little bit more face time between them might have been nice, but its absence does not ruin the episode by any means.

Speaking of Rose, the conclusion to her four-season-long arc was by far the most gratifying, largely because the Doctor actually said certain things about his relationship with Rose that I've been saying for years. I've never been one to believe that the Doctor requited Rose's feelings for him. I have, however believed that their relationship was special because she made him a better man. She made the bitter and jaded Christopher Eccleston into the more optimistic (though still scarred) David Tennant. She helped him get over the horror of destroying two civilizations, one of which was his own. The Doctor basically says as much in this episode, and gives Rose and the Hand Doctor exactly what they deserve: each other. I don't really understand why a fully-fledged copy of the Doctor has been interpreted by the fandom as a sex doll, but then again, I've never owned one, so I suppose I don't know what I'm talking about. As far as I'm concerned, this is the perfect conclusion to Rose's story. Last time we visited Bad Wolf Bay, we were told that Rose could never return, but that had zero credibility (I mean, come on, Mickey had already done it!) and there was no real closure: the shadow of Rose continued to hang over to program. That shadow is now lifted, and both she and the Doctor can get on with their lives; the story no longer calls out for resolution but the possibility is left that sometime two, five, ten, or twenty years down the road Billie and David can both return to the program, together, if the need should arise.

Davros' role in this story served in part as the culmination of two major arcs: the "arc" of bringing back classic series icons one at a time, and the arc of the return of the Daleks that has been developed over the course of the series. This was simply the most effective use of Daleks since 2005's Dalek. The rivalry between the Doctor and the Daleks is iconic, but that was covered so marvelously in the afforementioned episode that there was nowhere left to build as far as that was concerned. The only thing that could develop the Daleks would be to do Daleks as characters in their own right: first the Dalek Emperor, then the Cult of Skaro, and here we culminate with three different Dalek characters: Davros (not literally a Dalek, obviously, but part of the Dalek mythology), Dalek Caan, and the Dalek Supreme.  The Dalek Supreme did exactly what it says on the tin: he was a superlative version of what made a Dalek: more arrogant, more likely to shout, more dangerous-seeming. Dalek Caan was not only creepy and funny at the same time but also a gratifying payoff to the Doctor's feeble attempts to convince the Daleks that what they're doing is wrong. And Davros was everything that he should be. The level of charisma and intelligence was such that he seemed the fitting counterpart to the Doctor that he's always tried to be but never, in my opinion, quite succeed at before. The only problem I can identify is that it's done so effectively that it steals a bit too much thunder from John Simm's excellent portrayal of the Master. But I suppose it's all right because, although they are both counterparts to the Doctor, they are done in such different ways that it's not really a problem. And Julian Bleach's performance in the role is phenomenal. A joy to watch, and truly insane. That doesn't mean that the garden-variety Daleks don't have a shining moment in this episode as well: I am referring, of course, to the German Daleks. I don't think it's bigoted of me to find the German-speaking Daleks even more terrifying because of the Nazi connection. The Daleks have always been Nazi-like, and it is from this that they derive much of their terror. Amplifying that only makes them more frightening.

That Donna's departure disturbed, upset, and, ultimately, bovvered so many fans is to the credit of both Russell and Catherine.

Now, about Donna. It's heartbreaking, it's sad, and she doesn't deserve it. It really, truly hurts. But that's not something that should be held against the episode, because that's how stories are told. And this one has been told excellently. That Donna's departure disturbed, upset, and, ultimately, bovvered so many fans is to the credit of both Russell and Catherine. But the departure was strangely appropriate. The threads leading to this finale have been woven through the fabric of this series. The Doctor and Donna as a single entity was hinted at ages ago. I'm thinking in particular about the notion of Donna (and companions in general) as a part of the Doctor that has been externalized, that Donna acts as the Doctor's conscience. I mentioned this specifically in my review of Planet of the Ood, noting the similarity between this concept and the tripartite consciousness of the Ood. Not to mention the foreshadowing of Donna's fate through the false lives she lived in Forest of the Dead and Turn Left. Donna's fate is the logical culmination of what we saw this series, and as tragic as it is, I can think of no ending for her character that is anywhere near so devastatingly fitting. In the end, Donna and the Hand Doctor share the same horrible fate: Just as Donna is reset to the meaningless chatter of her former life, the Hand Doctor is reset to the genocide of the Time War. Sure, the Hand Doctor has been given Rose to make him a better man, just as she did once before, but hasn't Donna also been put in the capable hands of her grandfather? Surely now that Wilf has seen firsthand what Donna can become he will stop at nothing to encourage her much the same way the Doctor has, won't he? Surely the Doctor struck a nerve when he rebuked Donna's mother, and things will be different from now on, won't they? Surely her family can save her from the falseness of her existence just as she was saved by Miss Evangelista and then by Rose, right? I'm not just imagining these implications, am I? I just wish they had been more explicit, like they were with the Hand Doctor and Rose! It is my fondest hope that sometime in the future, the Doctor will encounter Donna in some capacity and see that she is living a life of meaning and happiness, and smile to himself because of it. Will it ever happen? I don't know how likely it is, but the hope that Donna can be a better woman even without the Doctor is all we as fans now have. Regardless, Donna's ending is more powerful than any death would have been, and despite its similarity to both Parting of the Ways and Doomsday, it was one of the best things about this episode.  However, talking only about the elegant closure of the arc doesn't cover half of it, because this final performance by Catherine Tate is truly astounding. Not only does she clinch her status as an iconic companion, she also delivers what can only be described as the single most convincing case ever made for casting a female Doctor. The emotional range she displays in this episode is truly astounding, as we see her at her highest and lowest moment and easily believe every second of it. Donna is one of the best things that could ever have happened to this program and seeing her go is tough.

Yeah, the episode wasn't perfect. I freely admit that. The regeneration felt like a cop out, although it wasn't, because it ultimately had major consequences. You say it's a bit preposterous? Yeah, maybe, but no more so than Romana's regeneration in Destiny of the Daleks. And on the bright side, the Hand has handed down its last deus ex machina after spending far too much time kicking around the Whoniverse and acting as a convenient plot device. Last week, I knew, as we all did, that the regeneration was fake, but what I said was that I would be fine with it as long as it was a fake with consequences worth watching. And this was worth watching. Another major flaw was the lack of anything important for Mickey and Jackie. But these are characters which I originally hated but came to love after two series, and their main function here is just to have them along for the ride. And that's fine, though it's rather awkward that Mickey and Rose don't even interact. I understand that resurrecting the Doctor/Rose/Mickey love triangle would have distracted from the other arcs that needed treating, but the lack of closure here still bothers me a bit. If Mickey is truly joining Torchwood, then will the shadow of Rose hang on that show as well? God, I hope not. That's the last thing Torchwood needs. Another serious flaw was the use of sudden last-minute time bubbles, teleports, and transmats to move the plot in a way that was simply lazy. However, this didn't detract much from my enjoyment of the episode either because anything other than a quick and dirty resolution would have wasted time and thrown off the pace. I'm fine with Tosh's time bubble as long as it prevents a Ianto-and-Gwen-fight-Daleks subplot, from which the episode would have suffered more severely.

Ultimately, though, in spite of all of the faults, and even if I'm really just crazy, seeing tied-up threads where none exist, it still has to be said that this episode was a blast nonetheless. Big, explosive, scary, full of thrills, and full of heart. Watching it was a pleasure and re-watching it was even more of a pleasure, for all the reasons I've listed in my review but also for all the reasons Stuart listed in his review. There was something for everyone in Journey's End, and it's a pity more people didn't find it. So, I'm sorry I can't join the angry mob, and I fear I'm about to be lynched by the newly energized and expanded throng of RTD haters, but that was my honest opinion and I'm sticking by my guns here. This is easily the best finale Russell has given us so far and it was a fitting end to a phenomenal series, not to mention a largely successful four year stint in the hardest and best job in television. This was a marvelous celebration of Doctor Who past and present, and I applaud it.

So Long, and Thanks for all the Pollen

Scattered around the world and disconnected from each other, Earth's greatest heroes independently investigate a dark and terrible occurrence. Ultimately, their common history and common cause draw them together to combat a threat from the past that has become dangerously present.

Yawn.

Doctor Who: The Stolen Earth

Am I talking about The Stolen Earth, or am I talking about the first issue of the new Titans comic book series, written by Judd Winick and featuring the popular characters from George Perez and Marv Wolman’s New Teen Titans comic? The first issue of the new series features such former Teen Titans as Nightwing, Donna Troy, Beast Boy, and Cyborg independently attacked and they have to come together to discuss what’s going on and what to do about it.

Or perhaps I’m referring to one of the many other times that a variation on the same trope has been used: everywhere from The Five Doctors to the Council of Elrond in The Fellowship of the Ring to the meeting between Kaito Nakamura and Angela Petrelli in the first episode of season two of Heroes. It boils down to the idea that the old guard have all seen the signs and now have to get together to discuss what's happening. It’s not an inherently boring device, but it is rather hackneyed, and so it’s not really adequate to drive an episode. Which is exactly what’s happening here.

Cohesion? Check. Coherence? Errr... quick! distract the audience! Penelope Wilton! Adjoa Andoh! Richard effing Dawkins!

It’s a little different here, because many of these characters haven’t met each other. For the first time, Matha Jones, Ianto Jones and Harriet Jones can talk to one another. And nifty as that idea sounds, am I really supposed to care? Turn Left drew from the program's recent past to give it the momentum it needed, to a certain degree of success. The Stolen Earth broadens its focus by drawing from the spin-offs that aired during that time, and it does so in a cheap, lazy, and boring fashion. I'm all for building a cohesive, coherent universe. Cohesion? Check. Coherence? Errr... quick! distract the audience! Penelope Wilton! Adjoa Andoh! Richard effing Dawkins! Because that's the tactic that's used here, and if the Appreciation Index is any indication, it works marvelously. Which, of course, it doesn't (perhaps there's a reason that no such thing exists in America). As much as I love The Sarah Jane Adventures, and as much as I've come to like Ianto and Gwen, why even bother enlisting them for this show when we know that they won't undergo any significant level of development, and they don't even really interact with each other (aside form Jack and Sarah Jane, who are both Doctor Who characters in any case)? Why bring these characters in at all if they're only going to be used as crew on the good ship Exposition, captained by a nonsensical version of Harriet Jones, who gets none of her well-deserved face time with the Doctor?

Why did they pay all of these actors to show up and deliver a couple lines of exposition when we're gearing toward a finale that should be powered by the triple threat of David Tenant, Billie Piper, and Catherine Tate? After a Donna-Lite and a Doctor-Lite episode, why on Poosh can't the two of them get more than a couple moments of screen time together? If Rose is so important, why can't we see her do more than point her gun at looters and complain about not being involved enough? Again, why bother to bring back Billie Piper if you're not going to put her to any amount of use? I was especially disappointed by her absence because Piper gave a much better performance in this episode. She actually seemed like Rose and not like a lame version of the Doctor.

It turns out The Shadow Proclamation^TM is simply a bunch of Judoon and albinos who are rooming with an army of Jango Fett clones.

I'm getting carried away with my criticism, I know. This wasn't a bad episode of television. It was pretty good. I liked a lot of the little past references to things like Calufrax and The Dalek Invasion of Earth. And the screen time between the Doctor and Davros was great, for what little it was. But it should have been so much better. I usually love episode twelve. I loved Bad Wolf. I loved Army of Ghosts. I loved The Sound of Drums. All of those worked because they had developed out of plot points that had been seeded throughout their respective series. Well, The Stolen Earth does that too. It just does so in a shitty way. The bees? What the hell? Come on! I was half expecting someone the Douglas Adams reference I made in the title of this review to show up in the episode. The fact that Donna didn't instantly pick up on the bee thing when the Doctor asked her about odd phenomena is really flipping stupid. She remembered Pyrovilia, but not the bees? Hardly likely, What would have made sense would have been if the Doctor had asked her about phenomena on Earth and she stared at him,  like he was some sot of idiot. "What?" the Doctor asks in that David Tennant-y sort of way. "The bees, Einstein!" she shouts. But no. And then there's the revelation of the Shadow Proclamation^TM, which it turns out is simply a bunch of Judoon and albinos who are rooming with an army of Jango Fett clones. There's no culmination of any real kind, just the lame wrap-up of these meaningless threads.

Threads that, ultimately, have nothing to do with Davros or the Daleks in particular, which is why they fail so miserably. There was absolutely no buildup to Davros whatsoever. He merely shows up. Series Three built to the final revelation of the Master with a focus on Mr. Saxon and a variety of hints toward the fact that another Time Lord existed and how he might have hidden. Not so, here! Davros and the Daleks are tacked onto the end. And the star villains of the episode, the masterfully-portrayed Davros and the delightfully creepy Dalek Caan, are, like Tennant, Tate, and Piper, not given their well-deserved screen time. Davros's return is completely underwhelming despite the near-perfect design and portrayal of the character.

And let's make sure Sarah Jane steers clear of that hand or any other severed hands. Eldrad Must Live, remember?

In case it hasn't been clear, I'm going to boil my opinion of this episode down to a couple of sentences. We were promised "big." And in Doctor Who, that should mean "bigger on thie inside," but this isn't big, it's bloated. It's just a lot of flashy outside stuff and no substance. And how could I possibly end this review without talking about the biggest thing in the episode: the regeneration? It's fake. It's faker than fake. If you read the news, you know it's fake, and it you watched the episode you know it's fake because they would give David Tenant a far better send-off than this. There's almost no question in my mind that David Tenant will stay on as the Doctor at least through the Christmas special, and the fact that the Doctor's hand will be involved is almost undeniably involved. Russell simply won't let us forget it's around. And let's make sure Sarah Jane steers clear of that hand or any other severed hands. Eldrad Must Live, remember? Anyhow, the only question that remains about David Tennant's "regeneration" is the nature of the fake. We're not getting a regeneration, but we had better be getting something worth watching.

I honestly think I would have enjoyed this episode far more if there had been anything surprising at all in it. But I knew about all of the guest appearances. And I had heard the set report of Captain Jack carrying the Doctor into the TARDIS after a Dalek extermination. I can hardly imagine the thrill I would have gotten watching this episode if all of the cameos had been complete surprises to me. But you can't keep a secret in television anymore. From here on out, however, I'm resolving to steer clear of spoilers as much as I possibly can. Since I live in a country whose media isn't as obsessed with this show as I am, maybe it won't be so hard.

Good Wolf, Bad Wolf

Doctor Who: Turn Left

Did you catch the trailer for next week's episode? Boy howdy, it was a long one, clocking in at nearly fifty minutes.

Because seriously, that's all this was. A big, honking, beautifully acted, poignant, moving trailer for the two-part finale that we'll be getting. And that list of glowing compliments doesn't let this episode off the hook for being what it is: A gigantic trailer. I mean, it's true that Utopia had it's trailer-ish elements as well, but this is something else. That episode was at least built upon its own original story, while this train wreck of an episode just lazily feeds off of the plot points of the past two years while blatantly (and openly) recycling material from earlier this series.

And Billie, you wait your turn. I'll get to you later.

There were things I liked about this episode, and I shall list them now. The biggest thing is Catherine Tate, and in the spirit of this episode I shall express my opinions about her performances by copying and pasting sentences from reviews I've already posted. "But dammit, Tate, what’s wrong with you? Can’t you throw me a bone once in a while? Give me something to complain about? Why can’t you be anything less than lovely?" "Even most former TateHaters have to admit that Donna's return benefits both her character and the show." "Donna, meanwhile, has my unambiguous approval as I mentioned earlier." "It turns out I like Donna better! If you'd told me I'd feel that way a couple of months ago (hell, a couple of weeks ago), I'd have had a difficult time believing it." "I continued to appreciate Donna's presence to the point that it's getting tiresome to write about it. She's excellent! I can't complain about anything."

See? I can reuse my material too! Now where's my OBE?

To say that this is Tate's best performance is no small compliment, I think. But credit is also due to Bernard Cribbins and Jacquline King as Donna's family. The former had me at hello, and the latter has finally won me over.

And that's about it.

I don't quite buy Rose's current characterization as the cool, calm Harbinger of Crisis on Infinite Whoniverses. Yeah, I went there.

You know, it's funny. Just a couple weeks ago I was talking to someone and I mentioned something to the effect of, "one of the very few things that would permanently end my Doctor Who fandom is if Billie Piper were to be cast as the Doctor." And, sadly, the day has come when that statement has been put to the test. Because that's exactly what has happened in this episode: Billie Piper has almost literally become the Doctor. She talks like him. She plays his name game. She bosses UNIT around. She travels in time and finds a companion. And she acts generally nothing like Rose Tyler. Anything likable about Rose (or, for that matter, anything unlikable about Rose) has been stripped away with this ridiculously neutered performance Billie Piper gives. I mentioned to a friend that I thought this was by far the worst performance Piper has ever given in Doctor Who, which he countered by bringing up the Deus-Ex-Rose-Tyler ending of The Parting of the Ways three years ago. Yeah, okay. That was probably Piper's worst moment, but looking at her performance in the episode as a whole, some of her better moments were present as well. I'm referring to the scenes during which she despairs of ever seeing the Doctor again, after he has sent her home. BIllie Piper was at the top of her game in that episode and thinking about it just makes me even more displeased with her performance here. I don't quite buy Rose's current characterization as the cool, calm Harbinger of Crisis on Infinite Whoniverses. Yeah, I went there.

And don't even get me started on all the flipping name-dropping. It's been done to death in the spin-offs with oblique (or occasionally direct) references to the Doctor himself. But when they do the reverse here it just seems cheap, like Russell is trying to draw momentum from outside sources to propel the episode when it would make more sense just to concentrate on the story of the episode. Oh wait, what story? I feel dirty comparing this episode to Midnight, but the mentions of spin-off characters gets exactly the same complaint as my complaint about the Rose cameo last week: it's meant to be tantalizing but it's just distracting. Couldn't we have left that all for the trailer, where it's meant to belong? Oh, wait, I forgot: This whole episode is nothing more than a flipping trailer, combined with a lame rehash of the story of Doctor Who for the last two seasons. Except for the most important part, ie, the return of the Master (yes, yes, I know, it makes sense).

SHIT. SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT.

At this point in the review writing, I had some friends over and re-watched the episode and entirely changed my mind about it. I flipping love this episode! Shit! What am I going to do with the nearly-complete review that I've already written?

And I'm not even interested in discussing the beetle aside from working in a reference to Donna eventually casting it of as though it were Pete Best. 

My points still stand with regard to Billie Piper's performance and the need to name-drop for the sake of giving the series some forward momentum (obviously intended to psych the viewer for the guest roles next week). And I'm not even interested in discussing the beetle aside from working in a reference to Donna casting it of as though it were Pete Best. But what I said was wrong for a few reasons.

First of all, how ridiculous was I to brush off Tate's performance as I did? I didn't even really say anything meaningful about what must be the best performance by a companion since the revival of the series. Hell, maybe the best ever. Donna is my favorite companion out of the ones who will be appearing over the next two weeks (yes, that includes Sarah Jane, who is probably number two). The fact that she is leaving the program at the end of this series makes me somewhat glad that the program is taking a year off because I admit I'm afraid it will be a poorer show without her. She significantly raised the bar for the show and this was the top of her game. The only pity is that Donna will not carry with her the experiences she had in the parallel universe. Unlike Martha's experiences in the negated timeline and Donna's married life on the Library's computer, or even John Smith's romance with Matron Redfern, all of which are remembered as actual experiences, this serves no such purpose. No character has been developed in any meaningful way, not even Donna, who barely remembers it all.

Which is why, I suppose, this felt so empty to me at first: It was all a dream and we were aware of this from the beginning. This episode served two functions: it built the Rose hype to its climax and it delivered some exposition about the final two-parter. Neither of which were really necessary, which makes me wonder whether this episode was written simply to give Catherine Tate something to do while David Tennant was busy filming Midnight. I'm not going to talk about whether Rose's new characterization works or whether her return is worthwhile at all; that's something I'm going to save for my review of the finale, because only then will I be able to form an opinion that's any better than the knee-jerk one expressed above.

Damn. And for once I thought I was going to get to write a negative review.

So ultimately, none of that other stuff matters at all because this episode is driven entirely by the engine that is Donna Noble: the raw emotional power of Tate's performance, the character's unique role in the story of the relationship between the Doctor and Rose, The best performance by her family to date, and it must be said that she is helped by some challenging and entertaining material by Davies in his best script since last week. Seriously, though, now that I've given this episode a bit more of a chance, I do have to admit that, in its own, weird way, it serves as a fitting "companion" to last week's episode. The relationship between the Doctor and his companion has never been examined quite this closely. Midnight was not just a companionless story, but rather a story about companionlessness, and what it means to the Doctor without a companion. Turn Left, then, is the opposite: a story about what a companion is without the Doctor. And then, of course, there's the two-part finale, which features a small army of companions.

Damn. And for once I thought I was going to get to write a negative review. But there's hope yet! And if the next two are good, I might end up having to wait for Torchwood.

The Pool is Abstract!

Doctor Who: Midnight

Come back, Russel! All is forgiven!

Okay, I'm exaggerating. I was never a huge Davies detractor. Nor am I any less excited for the Moffat Era of Doctor Who. But I do admit that seeing Davies' name in the credits of an upcoming episode has never given me the same thrill as seeing a name like Paul Cornell or Steven Moffat. And quite rightly, too: their scripts have always been stellar while Russell's scripts have usually been merely very very good at best and sort of shit at worst. I was certainly worried about this week's episode. Nothing in the trailer appeared that interesting to me, but that rarely means anything at all. If this episode's trailer had been at all accurate to what we were getting, then I'd have been right.

But this episode was brilliant.

Of course, the entire premise of the episode is terribly ironic, when considered in contrast with series three. "No weapons, just words," Martha patiently explained to the Master like a kindergarten teacher talking to a student in last year's finale. It was foreshadowed by Shakespeare's powerful use of words in The Shakespeare Code and made literal when Martha laughed off the incurably lame video-game-plot of a weapon (A gun powered by four chemicals sounds suspiciously like some kind of lame sci-fi perversion of a Legend of Zelda plot) and used a single word to bring down the Master, "Doctor." Okay, that was kind of lame too. But you get the point.

Words are Worthless (Take that, Wordsworth!)

Here we get the opposite. Words are worthless (Take that, Wordsworth! Which reminds me, that's another famous person the Doctor needs to meet). As General Staal told us in The Sontaran Stratagem, "words are the weapons of womenfolk." But they're often the only weapon the Dcotor has, as we see this week especially once he has no companion to help with crowd control and there's nothing around the the Sonic Screwdriver can help him with. His weapon is his ability to communicate, but ultimately that's useless to him.

A couple of weeks ago, my colleague Frank compared Silence in the Library to The Library of Babel by Jorge Luis Borges, which he explained then as "a vast library contains all of the secrets of the universe." True, and an apt comparison. I'm sure it was a conscious reference on Moffat's part as well. But I can't help but feel that an even stronger comparison can be used in reference to this episode. The Library of Babel didn't just contain all of the secrets of the universe. Rather, it contained every possible permutation of alphabetical characters that could fit in one of its books. So, obviously, it contained the secrets, and in every language, but it also contained volumes upon volumes of meaningless streams of characters, such as "axaxaxas mlo" (which, technically, isn't meaningless but is actually a rather funny inside joke if you've closely read Borges' other stories, but that's beside the point).

The point is this: sure, the Library of Babel holds the secrets of the universe, and your horoscope for the next three decades, and the complete text of the Harry Potter Encyclopedia that J.K. Rowling hasn't even started yet. It has all of those things, but despite the fact that the words are all there, they lose their power because they're entirely divorced from any sort of intent. Borges plays further with this idea in Pierre Menard, Author of the Quixote and I swear to God that I am done talking about Borges. As you have possibly guessed, what I'm driving at is something that's actually fairly simple: why this particular sort of mockery hurts the Doctor so much. His ability to reason through the problem and then speak about his conclusion is his usual tactic and is here his only tool. But what good is his reasoning if the end product (ie, his voice) can just as easily be pronounced by an entity that didn't arrive at it by reasoning? By repeating his words she robs them of their meaning, and that's truly scary: words without meaning are nothing more than the frantic calls of "Hey, who turned out the lights" coming out of Proper Dave's spacesuit in Moffat's two-parter. It was extremely creepy there and it's even creepier now that the Doctor's the victim. Perhaps the most terrifying thing at all is the thin, thin line between the copier and the copied.

This is the first episode where Catherine Tate failed to wow me. And that's only because she was hardly in it.

Yes, it was terrifying, in an intelligent sort of way. David Tennat's performance was simply brilliant and after the range of varied and nuanced performances he's given this season I'm afraid there's nowhere to go but down for him. I sincerely hope that I am wrong. This is the first episode where Catherine Tate failed to wow me. And that's only because she was hardly in it. And the guest cast was absolutely perfect, everyone from the faux-Doctor played by David Troughton to the tragically inadequate Jethro. His turning against the Doctor hurt most of all. Murray Gold's score was brilliant. Probably not his most memorable tunes, but that's not what it's about. It's about how the music services the episode and Murray does so wonderfully. As Doctor Who Confidential won't let us forget, the sound mixing in this episode is fantastic and the episode owes a lot of its excellence to the sound. And it's a good thing that the sound people are so competent, because the visuals in this episode aren't as important a component as they usually are. It's the script, the acting, and the sound that make this episode, and they're all wonderful.

In fact there was only one thing that upset me about this episode. And that thing goes by the name of Rose Tyler. Did anyone really need that little reminder that Rose was coming back? It was annoying in The Poison Sky and it was even worse here. Surely we didn't need a cameo to remind us of her imminent return. Isn't that what the trailer is for? Can't we wait another half hour for that, and enjoy this episode without Rose intruding on it? As a relatively new face to this blog I've never really had a chance to make clear how I feel about Rose. And I suppose I'll get to that next week, but I have to say this: I don't hate Rose, but I do hate the shadow she's cast across the program since her departure. The occasional mention would be all right, but she's been mentioned by name, alluded to, or shown in more than half of the stories since her departure and all I want is for it to end. Bringing her back is a good way to do this, so I can grit my teeth through this week knowing that her return is imminent and perhaps the Doctor can put his Rose issues to rest at last.